Ice cubes sliding on the skin on the abdomen

Beginner’s Guide to the Temperature Play



With extensive experience in both the vanilla realm and the kink realm, I can confirm that introducing ice cubes into the bedroom is indeed a great idea. However, if you're interested in the concept of contrasting hot and cold sensations to enhance pleasure during sex, there are tons of exciting possibilities beyond the simple ice cube trick.


Whether you're new to the game or a seasoned player, if you're looking to spice up your sex life or your kinky escapades, you've come to the right place. Armed with this guide, your safe word, and a solid aftercare plan, you can enjoy Netflix and a night of true relaxation—or maybe Hulu and a steamy session? Accept suggestions.


What is the temperature game?

Temperature play involves exploring various temperatures as part of sensory play in a sexual context. Like many BDSM practices, it covers a range of intensities, from mild and low-risk experiences (such as using warm lube or running ice over nipples) to more intense and potentially painful activities (such as branding) . The key is to find the level of temperature regulation that suits your comfort and needs.


Why do people like temperature games?

People find fun in temperature games for a variety of reasons. Some people are attracted by straightforward consent and the opportunity to explore strong feelings in a safe environment. For some, the heightened attention that pain brings is a unique aspect of sexual masochism. The release of endorphins increases attraction.


Others, focus more on the sensory experience. Enjoy playing with the wax figure and find it grounding and centering. From the feel of hot wax on your skin to the smell of burning candles, various sensations contribute to the overall sensory enjoyment of the experience.


How do I start trying out the temperature game?

If you're interested in trying low temperature, the preparation is simpler but may take some time. Make sure you have enough ice to avoid a last-minute rush to the store, or place glass/metal toys in the freezer to chill before use. If your cold game involves exposure to snow or freezing temperatures, have a blanket and fuzzy socks ready to warm up after. Including finger and toe warmers can be an extra thoughtful touch.


Things to note when playing with fire

While playing with fire is considered a fringe or high-risk game, it is critical to recognize the inherent dangers associated with fire. After revisiting the safety tips above, if you're ready for this intense experience, there are activities you can try, such as feeling the torch rub against your skin or trying fire cupping.


For those curious about incorporating fire into the game, such experienced practitioners often use torches made from materials such as hot pot forks, cotton gauze, cotton finger cots, and cotton rope. Material choice is important because cotton does not melt when burned, reducing the risk of dripping onto your partner and causing burns. Soak the torch in isopropyl alcohol, squeeze out the excess, and light it.


Remember, safety and communication are crucial when playing with fire.


Fire cupping is a traditional Chinese medical treatment that can also be used to treat kinks. Use a lit torch inside the glass to increase the internal temperature. Once placed on areas such as the upper back, arms, legs and buttocks, the air inside the cup cools, creating a vacuum effect that draws it into the skin and muscles. Various modifications can be made, including adding a vibrator to the cup to enhance the sensation. For those who are only doing cupping (no other cupping games), I recommend applying oil or lotion to the base of the body and gently moving the cupping along the back. As always, safety and communication are crucial when exploring such practices.


Candle game

Discovery Wax Game offers exciting temperature play with low stakes, making it a great introduction to this type of sensory play. In wax play, candles are used to heat wax via an open flame, a candle heating plate, or a hot water bath. The melted wax is then applied to the skin to stimulate the senses.

Candle wax dripping on sexy woman's skin


Before we dive into candles, it’s important to understand what they are made of. Factors such as the type of wax (soy, paraffin, beeswax), added fragrances or colored dyes can all affect the melting point of a candle. It is recommended to purchase candles from a reputable fetish supplier to ensure they are specifically designed for kink play. Reputable options will usually provide information on melt temperature. In addition, communication with the base is crucial to check whether there are any allergies or sensitivities to the candle ingredients.


The next step is to choose the right play area. Some practitioners, preferring a bathtub, use warm water to lighten the intensity of the beginner's wax and simplify cleanup. Alternatively, when not in the tub, surface protection such as a tarp is recommended to prevent staining of sheets or damage to carpets. As with any BDSM activity, prioritizing communication and safety is key.


Ice cube game

To balance the heat of fire and wax play, exploring ice play can be a refreshing experience. The ice game was my first time trying a temperature game and it provided a unique feel, especially after the heat was introduced, creating a contrasting experience.


Use ice cubes according to your mood for a pleasant and more intense feeling. To get a sensual touch, he recommends placing a good-sized piece of ice in your mouth and sliding it over different parts of your body. This adds a surprisingly cold tingling quality to the feel of the kiss, challenging the warmth usually associated with it. Putting ice in your mouth ensures that it melts sufficiently and doesn't stick to or burn the skin on the bottom.


If you prefer direct contact with ice on your skin, take precautions by wearing gloves and briefly rinsing the ice under cold water to lower its surface temperature. You can then rub ice cubes on your body at the bottom for a pleasant experience.


For those who are prone to sadistic behavior, place a plastic bag filled with ice cubes or an ice pack in their underwear until they use a safe word. As he describes it, a more drastic option involves inserting an ice dildo inside a condom into the vagina or anus. Make sure to rinse the ice dildo briefly under cold water to prevent sticking, and use lubricant. This particular activity is not for the faint of heart and requires careful consideration of boundaries and communication.



Expanding the scope of your temperature play, you can explore topics like capsaicin, tiger balm, or cooling ointment for a unique experience. Capsaicin, because of its ability to mimic heat, creating a burning sensation without actual heat. Cold exposure provides another avenue, such as taking ice baths, splashing cold water in a heated room, or rinsing with cold water.

Back to blog