Paper bag with sex toys and flowers on white background, closeup

How to Hide Your Sex Toys?

Need to keep your toys a secret? If you share a living space with roommates or family, discreet dildos, low-volume vibrators, and discreet sex toys are a must.

A discreet vibrator should make minimal noise or blend seamlessly into your surroundings. Explore easy-to-hide options, packs Plus, learn how to hide existing toys with lockable storage solutions.

It’s crucial to prioritize body-safe sex toys designed for genital or anal play. Choosing such toys promotes better health and hygiene than using random household items or fruits and vegetables.

Unlike items like toothbrushes or hairbrushes, non-porous materials like silicone, ABS plastic, and borosilicate glass ensure no lingering bacteria. These hygienic toys are safe to use and will not cause harm or breakage to your body. They are easy to maintain by simply cleaning them with soap and water.

Here are some additional strategies for ensuring careful use of vibrators:

Place the vibrator under your sheets or use it with a thin pillow on your lap.

Keep ceiling fans or air conditioners running to create ambient noise.

Play music, TV shows, or any consistent media noise on your device.

Use waterproof toys in the shower and use caution.

It's worth noting that decibel readings may not accurately reflect how noisy a vibrator is. The human ear is more sensitive to irregular sounds than to a constant buzz. Vibrators that feature intermittent sound bursts, squeaks, or rapid air pulses may appear louder, even though they measure only 48 decibels. This includes the S's unique popping noise

Disguised Vibrators: Fun and Discreet

These cleverly designed sex toys evoke the true essence of the word "playful." Some of them are discreet enough that you can leave them on your bedside table without arousing suspicion (as long as no one is snooping around to press the button!).

Quiet and Discreet Non-Penile Dildo

Non-vibrating dildos and butt plugs are perfect for those looking for a quiet and satisfying experience. They operate without any additional noise other than the subtle sound of gently sliding in and out. In fact, if you're particularly obsessed with your dildo, you might end up being the loudest part of the equation, trying to stifle your faster breathing or moans!

Non-phallic or non-realistic dildos offer an alternative to traditional human penis reproduction. Unlike their venous or anatomically detailed counterparts, non-penile dildos are not designed to mimic a disembodied penis. Instead, they offer a more abstract, versatile option that doesn't immediately scream "dildo" like the hyper-realistic models. Non-penile dildos and plugs may:

Discreet storage solutions for your sex toys

If you live with nosy roommates who invade your personal space, it's important to have a secure locking mechanism to hide your sex toys. Smaller toys under 7 inches in overall length are easiest to hide in a lockable bag or box.

This is my go-to method for hiding sex toys and it can hold a surprising amount of items:

Step 1: Find or buy a backpack that fits well and has two zipper pulls for the main compartment. Standard-sized backpacks can hold dozens of toys, and body-safe materials generally don't react negatively when they come into contact with each other while being stored.

Step 2: Get a travel padlock where you can set your own code to open it. Look for smaller, full metal rings (shackles) for maximum security within the zipper. These locks are often called "TSA-approved luggage locks" and cost between $7 and $15.

Step 3: Place the toys inside the backpack and cover them with clothing or other items to further hide them. Make sure there are no visible gaps between zipper tabs. Thread the padlock through both zippers, press into the shackle, and hide your combination. While the backpack's zipper may come apart slightly, it doesn't open far enough to allow easy access to items.

Or, for smaller storage needs, consider a Book Safe lock box. These safes have a metal compartment within the slipcase, which is perfect for smaller sex toys. While some book safes have plastic pages that require you to display the book spines on the shelf between other books, other safes feature actual paper pages for a more authentic look. Check out reviews for book cover options, from classics like the Bible and Alice in Wonderland to Les Misérables.

Additional secure storage options for your sex toys:

  1. Traditional Safe: Invest in a traditional safe with a metal exterior for long-lasting protection. Make sure to check the interior dimensions carefully to determine the size of product you can accommodate.
  1. Medication Lock Box/First Aid Kit: These boxes make great disguises, especially if you have small children. Look for options with built-in padlocks for added security.
  1. Stacking Lock Boxes/Field Boxes: Choose lock boxes with multiple locking points and check the interior dimensions to make sure they meet your storage needs. Some boxes come with padlocks or luggage locks for extra security.
  1. Tool Boxes with Key Locks: Consider a tool box with a built-in key lock for discreet storage. Available in a variety of sizes and made from heavy-duty plastic for durability. When choosing a storage option, prioritize security and make sure it can comfortably accommodate your collection of sex toys.
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