Sexy couple touching each other in bed

Rough Sex Guide


Maybe you’ve heard about rough sex or are curious about it? But don’t be afraid to express your desires and preferences if you haven’t brought them up due to stress and insecurity, so feel free to discuss them with your partner! This is important! This will make your sex process go more smoothly and allow you to enjoy the process better. Establishing boundaries and limits can keep us safe while allowing each other to feel more at ease and focus on having fun.


Expressing a desire for rough sex requires a mature conversation with your partner using clear and possibly formal language. It's not just a simple request like "Be rougher!" because this can be interpreted in many ways. Here are guidelines on how to lead a discussion.

1. Discuss boundaries beforehand

Before engaging in rough sex, discuss your boundaries thoroughly. In this discussion, be sure to state your boundaries and preferences, and ask the other party questions, such as how do you want me to treat you and what do you have preferences for? It would be great if you could make a separate form. Be clear about your desires and ask your partner about their comfort level. I recommend discussing intentions for new activities, such as spanking or banging play, and establishing safe words ahead of time. Traffic light codes, such as "green" for good, "yellow" for warning to slow down, and "red" for stop, are very useful for effective communication in tense moments. This ensures a consensual and mutually enjoyable experience while staying safe.

2. Have extra lubricant ready

Enhance your rough sex experience by adding extra lubrication. Roughness doesn't necessarily equate to physical wear and tear, but being well prepared is necessary, and using extra lube can significantly improve comfort and pleasure. Whether you're new to the world of lube or looking for guidance on condom and toy compatibility, exploring different options can help make the experience smoother and more pleasurable.

3. Express wishes and preferences


Be sure to communicate your desires and your boundaries before engaging in rough sex. Don't be shy, expressing your desires is a great gesture and can promote a sense of intimacy between you. Strengthen connections with each other. Boldly ask the other person what you want, how you want to feel and what you want the other person to do to you. For example, binding or spanking, choking, etc. Therefore, it is important to reach a consensus before starting to avoid subsequent injuries or misunderstandings. You can also use some props to demonstrate in advance to convey the intensity of stimulation you want. This way you can clearly indicate your preferences and enjoy it more focused.


Before engaging in rough sex, clearly communicate your wishes and limitations. Express specific preferences, such as wanting to be tied up and spanked, to ensure consensus is reached. Make it a priority to have a detailed pre-sex conversation to avoid misunderstandings. Use props such as ties for practical demonstrations to convey the level of intensity or restraint you feel comfortable with. This open communication helps establish a clear and consistent framework for the experience.

4. Prepare scenes and props

Prepare your own props for the desired scene. If you want to wear an eye patch, have one ready. Or you can use household items such as scarves, T-shirts, or even ties. Bringing your own props ensures a smooth transition from discussing your wishes to acting on them. This level of preparation helps create a seamless and enjoyable experience for you and your partner.


Imagine if you wanted them to blindfold you and they'd be like, "Of course! Where's the blindfold?" and you'd be like, "Oh, uh, I don't have one because I was too busy trying to figure out how to get you to blindfold me." eyes without making me sound like I'm asking for an entire Fifty Shades of Gray scene, because I really just wanted to go from there. Anyway, I didn't pick up," which quickly pauses. Even if it's just a T-shirt or a scarf, keep it next to the bed so you can grab it when you ask and he says yes. (Going back to the Fifty Shades thing, if you were in their shoes, a tie could make a really nice eye patch or wristband.) 


5. Start with a spanking

If you're not sure where to start, consider some popular options like hair pulling, spanking, wrist binding, and blindfolding. Make your wishes clear, such as asking for your wrists to be tied over your head for missionary style, or for a soft blindfold to be worn during intimate moments. Pulling hair, raising your hands above your head, or using spanking as foreplay are all exciting options to explore with your partner.


A man is spanking his female companion

6. Maintain communication and respect your partner’s wishes

Keep communication open during rough sex and don't hesitate to state your limits. If you find that an activity isn't for your liking or is becoming too intense, express your discomfort confidently. It's crucial to only have rough sex with people who respect your boundaries. If your partner doesn't respect your limits, you must prioritize your well-being and consider ending the encounter.

7. Find balance

When the intensity is consistent with your desires, you may experience heightened pleasure. The right moment is usually the perfect, harsh spanking or a stroke that suits your preferences. Increased satisfaction is a clear indication that you've found the right balance, resulting in an enjoyable and memorable experience.

8. Be prepared to fight back against them

Expect a two-way street when it comes to more intense competition. Initiating a conversation about strengthening intimacy is more than an invitation to accept; This is an opportunity to explore shared aspirations. Be prepared to have a mutual discussion and your partner may express their preferences, such as some kind of bondage. This openness can lead to the discovery of new dynamics, and you may find yourself embracing the role of dominant partner, adding depth and excitement to your sex life.

9. Performance reviews are not necessary

There is no need for perverted sexual performance evaluations. Embrace the journey and don’t worry about doing things the “right way.” If the spanking feels like kneading dough with your hands, or the handcuffs are uncooperative, laugh about it. Imperfections are part of the process, which is a great opportunity to improve communication and express your desires. In order to have wild, adventurous sex, you have to ask for what you want, so feel free to bring along cute props like a leather blindfold to add to the excitement.

Back to blog